New Year, New You: How to Set Goals That Are Authentically YOURS (Not Your Twin's, Not Anyone Else's)

Zoe Blackbourn
Jan 13
5 min read

Updated: Feb 4

Does January feel like pressure instead of possibility? Like everyone's watching to see if you'll finally "get it together" this year - including your twin?

Here's the truth nobody tells you about New Year goals: You don't have to want the same things as your twin. Or your family. Or that friend who's crushing it on social media. Or anyone else.

This year isn't about becoming a better copy of someone else. It's about becoming a truer version of YOU.

Setting My 2026 Goals Are Nothing Like My Twin's (And That's Beautiful)

Let me be vulnerable for a second. When I sat down to think about setting my goals for 2026 with my twin, I realized my goals look completely different from my twin sister's. And for the first time in my life, instead of feeling guilty about that, I felt... free.

My big goals for 2026:

Growing my hypnotherapy business to help other twins (and non-twins!) find freedom in their own identities
Moving in with my boyfriend and building our life together
Getting outside more - hiking in the National Parks, long walks in nature, quality time with loved ones
Deepening my meditation practice and using hypnosis on myself to keep growing
Mixing up my fitness routine with Pilates and maybe some yoga

My twin's goals for 2026:

Progressing in her management career
Focusing on running and fitness training
Exploring the dating world and meeting new people
Her own version of personal growth that looks nothing like mine

And you know what? We're both each other's biggest cheerleaders.

She's not doing Pilates with me. I'm not training for races with her. She's not building a hypnotherapy business. I'm not climbing the corporate ladder. We're on completely different paths - and that doesn't make us less connected. If anything, it makes our bond richer because we're showing up as our authentic selves, not copies of each other.

Why Setting Different Goals Away From My Twin Doesn't Mean Distant Hearts

Here's what I've learned: Being authentic to yourself actually strengthens your relationships, especially with your twin.

When you're trying to mirror someone else's goals, you show up as a watered-down version of yourself. You're resentful. You're performing. You're not really THERE.

But when you honour what YOU genuinely want? You show up whole. You have energy to celebrate their wins because you're not competing. You can be genuinely happy for them because you're happy for yourself too.

My twin and I are living proof. She gets excited hearing about my business plans. I love hearing about her dating adventures and career wins. There's no competition, no comparison, no keeping score. Just two people who love each other, living two different lives, and cheering each other on.

But We Still Do Things Together!

Don't get me wrong - different goals doesn't mean you can't share experiences with your twin.

A couple of years ago, my twin and I took on something massive together: hiking all 214 Wainwrights in the Lake District. Every single peak. We smashed it. And it was one of the most exhilarating experiences of our lives - not because we had to do it, but because we BOTH genuinely wanted to.

That's the difference. When you're clear on your individual path, the things you DO choose to do together become even more meaningful because they're chosen, not obligated.

And this year, setting goals with my twin sister has been fun because we've seen what we both want for 2026 without judgement, without fear, without anxiety holding us back. And now we get to be the best friend as well as the sister to making both our dreams come true individually. And a top focus point for us both, we both want to focus on our health and well-being, and so we'll be each others accountability partner too.

So What Goals DO You Want for 2026?

Not what your twin wants.

Not what your parents expect.

Not what looks good on Instagram.

Not what you should want.

What do YOU actually want?

Maybe it's:

The confidence to move away from your twin and live where you've always dreamed of
Taking up that hobby your twin has zero interest in (and doing it anyway!)
Finally putting yourself out there in the dating world
Starting that business you've been thinking about for years
Setting boundaries you've been too scared to set
Choosing a career path that excites YOU, even if it's not "practical"

Or maybe, like me, it's a mix of big dreams and small shifts. More meditation. More nature. More authenticity. More YOU.

How to Set Goals That Feel Like YOURS

Start by asking yourself these questions:

Looking back at 2025:

What am I genuinely proud of?
What brought me real joy?
What felt like obligation vs. genuine desire?
What opportunities did I take? Which ones did I avoid?
Where was I living for myself vs. living for others' approval?

Looking forward to 2026:

If no one was watching, what would I do differently this year?
What would make me feel most alive?
What would I regret NOT trying?
What does my intuition keep nudging me toward?
When I imagine December 2026, what do I want to look back on with pride?

Then, take ONE small step

You don't have to have it all figured out. You don't need a perfect 12-month plan. You just need to take one authentic step toward what feels true for YOU.

That might be:

Researching that thing you've been curious about
Having that honest conversation you've been avoiding
Saying no to something that doesn't align with who you're becoming
Saying yes to something that terrifies you in an exciting way
Booking that discovery call with someone who can help you break through what's holding you back

The first step is always the hardest. But once you take it, the second becomes easier. Then the third. Then suddenly you're in flow, moving toward a life that actually feels like YOURS.

Woman on top of a mountain looking proud with open arms

Your Turn: What's Your 2026 Vision Setting Goals As Authentic You And Not Your Twin?

I'm genuinely curious: What do YOU want from 2026 setting your own goals from that of your twins?

When December rolls around and you're reflecting on this year, what would make you think, "Yes. I did that. I showed up for myself. I became more ME."?

Drop a comment below - I'd love to hear what you're moving toward this year!

Want Help Getting Clear?

If you're reading this thinking, "I don't even know what I want - I've spent so long being what everyone else needed that I've lost track of who I am"... I get it. I've been there.

That's exactly why I do what I do.

I've created a free reflection worksheet to help you get clear on:

What you achieved (and didn't) in 2025
What brought you joy vs. what drained you
What you genuinely want for 2026 (not what you should want)
How your goals compare to your twin's (if you're a twin) - and why that's okay!

Here's your goal-setting questionnaire below:

And if you realise you want support actually MAKING these changes - breaking through the guilt, the comparison, the people-pleasing, the fear - that's what I'm here for.

Book a Free Discovery Call and let's talk about where you want to be by the end of 2026, and how we can get you there.

This Year Is YOURS

Not your twin's year.

Not your parents' year.

Not society's year.

YOURS.

You deserve to want what you want.

You deserve to pursue what lights you up.

You deserve to become more authentically YOU this year, not a better copy of someone else.

Here's to 2026 - the year you stop performing and start living. Setting goals without your twin but making it fun to compare what you both want and where you cross over.

Let's make it happen. 💛

P.S. What's one goal you're setting for 2026 that feels scary but exciting? I'll go first in the comments! 👇